Saturday, November 03, 2001

didnt manage to study much.. nothing went in.. when i tried doing geog essays.. the whole thing was just screwed up.. now i am so worried.. oh man..... wat am i going to do?!
back again.. i am so screwed up.. didnt manage to get a nap at all.. tried calling DS.. first time round he was sleeping.. then he was out.. oh man.. shall try again soon

Friday, November 02, 2001

argh.. the pic didnt show.. nvm.. u can check out the pic at my webbie..
if u are going in there, please leave a note in a guestbook yeah? thanks
oh yay.. i am back.. had 4 hours of sleep.. how fun.. will be doing some geog essays.. may be asking miss nair to meet me later.. go thru my essays.. hope i will score better than before..

i am so bored.. shld i put my pics in here? maybe i shld.. ok.. i shall put one here..

not too sure if this can work here.. but it is worth a try.. i am the one on the left.. RL is the one on the middle.. debs is the one on the right.. we look good eh?? hehe.. the poster was rach's n debs' idea.. i didnt want it.. but well.. the peer pressure sets in.. sigh..

okok.. that will be all for now.. may be adding in more pics as time goes by.. so.. yeah..
oh man.. i can't sleep.. it is like 5:15 am over here in singapore.. O_O argh...... i think i had too long a nap in the afternoon and too much tea just now.. the caffeine is really getting to me.. the insomnia is setting in.. i can't believe this.. i just had 2 solid hours of geography and was lingering arnd my room when i decided to come online.. i feel like a friggin zombie.. i can't even type properly.. this is crazy.. i am tired but i can't sleep.. i think i will end up sleeping at 6 to 7.. before waking up at 11 or 2.. this is so damn crappy.. the last time i slept so late was coz i was on the phone with an asshole (he wasnt an asshole then.. but he is now..).. if only i am talking DS.. i wouldnt mind staying up till 7 am.. ok. i am going nuts.. i am not thinking straight AT ALL.. i am feeling reaaaally high at the moment.. which is NOT hands are starting to shake.. ok.. this is REAAAAALLLYYY BAAAAAAAAAAAAAD... i gotta go.. oh man.. bleah...
ok.. updated a whole lot of stuff.. think it will look good? hope it does.. ^^

updated my mood thing.. so that it suits my mood now.. somehow i can't get it to show my mood per day on blogger.. oh well.. maybe it can't.. will work on it tomorrow or something.. ^^

will be logging off soon to continue my geog studies.. yay.. i can't wait..
ok.. got the fonts n everything right.. now i just need to check up on the imood link
ok.. changed the template a little.. see if it works..
ok.. it worked.. yay.. ^^ i added the html code into the blogger template.. not too sure if it works.. hope it does.. ^^
starting my revision on chem n geog.. able to concentrate n be focused.. very very good improvement.. currently taking a short break.. had 2 cups of tea.. had a nap in the afternoon.. most likely able to stay up till quite late tonight.. i study best at night.. less distractions.. yay... i think i may call DS tomorrow to ask abt some geog stuff.. argh.. my complexion is getting a little disgusting.. eew.. think i better start using toner n stuff..

listening to mandy moore's Crush.. been listening to it all day.. love that song..

trying to get R to get an online diary.. coz he keeps reading mine n giving me stupid comments.. then i can't read his coz he doesnt have one.. ARGH~!!! this is kinda childish but well.. i was telling him he shld have one so that i can read wat kinda warped thoughts he thinks abt everyday.. n he told me that every entry would just have the line "hopes that ellie n DS will hook up"... what kinda idiot is he???? argh....... he still does not believe that i no longer have that thing for DS.. argh.. terrible fella.. he thinks that DS has a bad opinion of him.. coz i told DS abt the advice which R gave to me abt the geog essays.. n DS thinks that R gives bad advice.. both of them have not met.. they just noe abt each other's existence coz i mention the both of them to each other.. so now.. R thinks that DS doesnt like him.. n i dunno why.. i dun even know why R is so bothered abt it.. silly fella..

sometimes i really prefer having male friends to female friends.. despite the fact that males tend to get on my nerves pretty easily.. for example.. R n DS.. the classic examples of males who seriously demolish the reputation of all males in the world.. female friends are cool.. u can talk abt everything with a gal.. but with a guy.. it seems that there are more stuff to talk abt.. especially since they are told from a different point of view.. most of the guys i noe will keep a secret for me if i really want them to.. which is totally different from the gals..

i have a very strict criteria for my friends.. we must 'click'.. we must get along well.. i must not despise them.. ok.. lemme explain that point.. i have this tendency to sorta look down on pple who have low self esteem, are lazy to think.. ok.. the low self esteem thing is not that bad.. but the thing is they must not always be so concerned abt their looks n stuff.. it really bugs me.. so wat if they are fat? i dun care.. i like pple for their character.. pple who HAVE depth in their characters.. not just pple who worry day n nite abt their looks and hair.. it totally disgusts me.. i was once like this.. n now i think it was totally stupid.. thus, i can't stand pple who are like this.. i find them very shallow.. ok.. it may be too harsh a statement as there may be pple who have THE character but are just vain.. well.. until i have met someone like this, i am not going to be very convinced that there are actually such pple around.. my apologies to those who have been offended.. n those who are intellectually lazy.. where do i start.. pple who just refuse to think n prefer to depend on others for answers to their homework (usually the qns which require some amount of thinking).. my ex best friend used to be like this.. i would always get very irritated with her coz when we do geography.. she just doesnt want to think.. she always sayd that she doesnt understand the stuff.. i mean.. hello.. the teacher has been explaining the concept of watever we were learning for 2 YEARS!!!! if that isnt enuff to help.. wat can?! n she starts hating the teacher n the subject just coz of her own intellectual laziness.. i dun think that is very smart.. i dun like pple who have that problem.. it just irks me ALOT.. it's ok if they noe that they are wrong and they actually bother to learn up the stuff by asking n stuff.. that girl was just too shy to ask and she just kept on using the excuse that she didnt understand to explain her bad grades.. i think that is a really terrible attitude.. ok.. i am going way off.. so let's just stop there.. will talk abt it next time..

just got this imood thing.. pretty cute stuff.. not too sure if it will work over here.. oh well.. nothing ventured nothing gained.. so.. here goes nothing.. The current mood of at

Wednesday, October 31, 2001

just realised how much i miss my friends.. RL, debs, LH.. blah blah blah.. been spending so much time with DS and MN, starting to walk like DS and talk like MN.. was just chatting with RL on icq and she was telling me all the stupid things that debs was doing throughout tuition.. so funny.. i really miss being with them.. i miss hearing their voices n stuff.. haven't seen them for so long.. havent heard their voices for so long.. called debs the other night and she told me that she hasnt heard from me for so long.. even when i was at LH's place.. coz i was always at school n stuff.. so yeah.. i really miss them..

ok.. i noe i sound like i am overseas or something.. but i mean.. i used to see them everyday at school or something.. then now.. we have our exams coming up and it is getting kinda hard for us to meet up.. coz we have to study n all that.. so i am really starting to miss them.. imagine wat it wil be like after we all go our separate ways.. to separate schools.. sigh.. i need to get a handphone..

the exam schedule they gave us was so "spacious".. i dunno what word to use.. but there seems to be alotta time between each paper.. some weeks only have one paper n thats it.. so crazy.. how the hell do they expect us to actually get worried abt the exams when the schedule itself doesnt seem to intimidate us?! oh man.. sigh..
bleah... too early.. too late.. watever.. i am just talking nonsense..

i realised wat good friends i have last nite.. DS and RP.. well.. i called RP first to complain abt my geog essays which i have passed up to MN a few days ago.. i got really bad results for them.. so he gave me some suggestions on wat he thinks i can do.. but unfortunately.. they weren't very constructive.. then he suggested that i call DS.. until now.. RP still thinks that i like DS.. ok.. many others do as well.. but i honestly don't.. really.. DS is just a good friend.. nothing more nothing less..

ok.. i told RP that it was a very bad idea to call DS.. i mean.. wat for?! so wat if he was there when MN was marking my geog essays.. i made it known that it was a stupid thing to do.. then RP had to go take a shower n have his dinner so we had to hang up.. ok.. so wat abt him being a good friend? he was in malaysia when i called him up on his handphone.. he just called me back without any complaints and listened to me talk n cry over the phone.. he did try to cheer me up.. ok.. it worked.. so yeah..

then after hanging up, i called M.. but i think M wasnt free or something.. i asked him abt it n he told me that he had left his handphone at home.. n he didnt check.. but anywayz.. after i called him.. n he didn't pick up.. i called DS.. yes.. i noe.. i said i wasnt going to call him but the human mind is very contradictory when it comes down to the real thing.. so i called him to ask him if he wanted to meet MN on saturday to go through some more geog essays.. then he told me to hang on coz JS was on the other line.. then i waited for a very short while n he came back n he told me that he didnt really need any more help on geog.. he was more worried abt bio.. so i told him how worried i was abt geog n stuff.. then he gave me alotta advice on what i shld do n he also gave me alotta encouragements.. i felt so much better after that.. honestly.. the doubts just kinda disappeared.. DS was being a great pal coz when i called, he was talking to JS on the other line.. usually if i called to ask him something, he would just answer n tell me that JS was on the other line and he had to go n stuff.. but this time i think he told JS to hang up or something then he came back n talked to me.. that was the first time it has ever happened.. then.. after "counselling" me for awhile, i realised that he was studying bio at the moment.. so i told him that i shld let him go back to his studies.. then he gave me a whole buncha encouragements again.. telling me not to give up.. take care, all the best n stuff.. i am really glad for pple like him.. who actually take time off their studies especially during these crucial moments to actually talk to me.. i believe this is not the first time it has happened.. so yeah..

anywayz.. just wanted to record down a good thought before i go and study.. i have been truly inspired by DS.. i just am.. cool..

Tuesday, October 30, 2001

la di doo.. lovely day.. force fed myself even though i had no appeitite.. dunno why.. have been feeling pukey the entire week.. getting dizzy spells nowadays.. ok. i am NOT pregnant.. oh yeah.. wonder wat can it be.. maybe it is just my own imagination.. oh well..

i must make it a point not to get too close to DS.. when u get too close to someone too fast.. the chemistry kinda disappears.. so.. yeah.. i shld go really slow.. but then again.. i dun like him as in "like".. but well.. i think i am kinda scaring him.. i think he seriously suspects that i like him.. which is not good n not true. so.. yeah.. i dun want him getting funny ideas.. that is NOT good..

ok.. logging off. this is bad.. my exams are in less than a week and i am not studying.. this is VERY bad..